I live around some of the weirdest people (part three)

Neighbors family 3: The White House Across the Street (I made it gray in the picture for some reason...)
(Otherwise known as How to Run a Meth-Lab While Still Having a Thousand Children.)

If you haven't read part one
If you haven't read part two
Or just scroll down, if you're on the main page.

Anyway, after the people in the green house next door to us moved out (Scott and Matt and their father), we had about a year of relative quiet and tranquility (aside from the sounds of building and shit that was going on next door, where they were tearing down the green house and building a monstrosity, aka a really fucking big house).

Then, new tenants moved into the white house across the street, which had been up for rent for awhile.

To this day, I have no idea who lived there. There was someone new almost literally every day. Not to mention the billions of children those people seemed to produce, even though none of them should have had any right to contribute to the gene pool.

These people were constantly screaming at each other for really no reason.

And then the one skinny dude got home from prison.
We assume he was in prison because he wasn't there for the first few months, then he shows up, and not long after he shows up, there are cops there ALL THE TIME.
Also I think one of the others screamed something about him being in prison.

Anyway, so Skinny comes home, and later that night, one of the women in the house (the batshit crazy one) starts FREAKING THE FUCK OUT.
She's screaming at him "YOU'RE NOT SUPPOSED TO BE HERE! I'M PAYING THE RENT HERE AND YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO BE HERE" and all of this other crap.
So, inevitably, the police are called.
I don't know exactly what was said but there was more yelling and screaming and they wouldn't let Skinny in the house.
Eventually we heard them say something about how the crazy lady actually WASN'T paying the rent, it was Skinny's house, so she had to be off the property or something.
And eventually she was indeed kicking out of the house.
But not before this second incident happened, which is personally my favorite incident involving the people in the white house.

Me, my sister, and her friend Krista were on our way to see Death Cab for Cutie in Chicago.
We go out the front door, and as we're walking to the car in the driveway, we see crazy-lady outside with 6 kids, all of them playing in the street.
A car comes, stops so it doesn't hit the kids, and then the guy driving rolls down the window and yells something to the crazy lady about getting her damn kids out of the damn street.
It is as this point in which the crazy lady earns her name.

She runs over to the driver-guy and starts hitting his car, SCREAMING at him. She's yelling, "You shouldn't be driving on the street when there are kids present! you could have run them over! fucking asshole! watch where you're fucking driving! there are kids in the road! fuck! fuck you! Watch the fucking road, you prick!"

The driver-guy is completely bewildered at this point, and just rolls up his window and tries to drive away.
Crazy-lady, of course, continues screaming at this guy.
Her closing line is the best.
Before the guy drives completely away, she yells, "I HOPE YOU HAVE FUCKING LIFE INSURANCE!"

That doesn't even make any sense!
Is she going to go after him and kill him, and she just wanted to remind him to get life insurance so his loved ones have money?
Most bizarre advertisement for life insurance ever.
It was seriously the weirdest thing she could have possibly yelled at him. I have no idea what she hoped to accomplish by screaming that.

Anyway, a few more months go by, more kids continue appearing (we don't know where they came from or who they belong to, but there are about 20 of them), the cops are called a few more times but not for anything too serious, just things like potential domestic violence, screaming, and so on and so forth.

Then one day...well, night, the police get called again, and at first we were just kind of like "ugh, whatever, we are so over this."
And then we glanced outside and saw a big van that says DEA on the side of it.
If you aren't already aware, DEA stands for Drug Enforcement Agency (or maybe its Administration...fuck, I really don't know). They search for drugs. Make drug busts. All that stuff.
Suddenly this is beyond regular drugs and domestic violence and into dangerous shit.

Of course, it wasn't that exciting to watch, we don't think they found a meth lab or anything (though I'm still convinced there was a meth lab at one time in that house), the guys from DEA just kind of walked around menacingly, exploring the backyard and front yard and investigating the one van the people owned.
And then they left.
I was sort of disappointed. I was fully expecting some wicked shenanigans to start happening, like arrests and such.
But no. They just had explore-a-yard time at 11 pm, and then just left. Like they were on some scavenger hunt, and one of the things they had to do was find the most white trash people in the area and take a picture of their van.

Anyway, after that happened, the people in the white house were pretty quiet for awhile.
And then they just sort of...left.
It was weird. We all sort of expected them to reappear at any moment, except with 20 more kids with them. Like china had a buy-one-get-one sale on babies.
But no, they just sort of vanished, at least as far as I'm aware.
We think they got kicked out by whoever actually owns the house, because they were just renting it.

Last year my Dad went over there to ask to borrow a generator from some guys who were trying to clean up over there (we had lost power, and we had a big party planned. it was a fiasco), and the guys that were over there just said that it was a complete wreck inside.
Apparently druggies enjoy leaving things completely demolished...either that or that's the best way to hide the secret passage to your underground meth lab.

And that, my friends, is the conclusion of my crazy neighbors stories.
If I think of any other wonderful ones, I'll post them.
But for now...that is all.